Using a scathing two-word statement, Stephen Colbert began his Wednesday monologue by denouncing Donald Trump's most recent assaults on Chicago.

According to the host of The Late Show, Trump's plan to deploy the National Guard to the third-largest American city, which the president has called a "hellhole," has put him squarely on the fascist expressway.

"How dare you, sir!" exclaimed Colbert. At the moment, Chicago is not a hellhole. Until February, Chicago is not a hellhole. Then you're walking out of your cheap apartment to meet your improv pals at Twin Anchors for a double cheeseburger and a craft beer while taking in the subzero windswept view of frozen Lake Michigan. Hellhole. Mmm. Hellhole.

Pulling off his best Trump impression, he went on to say that Trump also said yesterday that Chicago is by far the worst and most dangerous city in the world. The worst and most hazardous? Two words, F*** you.

As the president was flipped off to the camera by the host of The Late Show, the live audience cheered loudly.

Colbert drew attention to another Trump post in which he referred to Chicago as the world's murder capital. "Fun fact: No," he corrected him. In fact, 22 U.S. cities have greater murder rates, according to FBI data, Colbert said.

Lifting a drink of the bitter native spirit of Chicago, "These are scary times," Colbert warned. Chicago, this Malört's for you.

Trump's response to a question about Chicago on Tuesday was, "They're going in." He didn't say when, but they're going in.

Vice President JD Vance, however, downplayed Trump's remarks on Wednesday. Despite Trump's tirades, he maintained there were no immediate plans to send the National Guard into Chicago. Up until now, Trump has only threatened to send military to cities or states that are governed by Democrats. Trump's June order to deploy 4,000 National Guard troops into Los Angeles was declared illegal by a federal court on Tuesday.

Mr. Trump, Lori Lightfoot, the former mayor of Chicago from 2019 to 2023, replied on X that no one with a working brain is buying your dumbshit.